A Feedback Formula for Success

If you are like me, giving feedback doesn’t come naturally to you. I have been in search of tips and tricks to help me structure feedback in a way that was clear and valuable to the recipient. After many years of research and practice, I have landed on this formula for structuring both positive and constructive feedback:

Intent + Fear + When + What + Impact

• Intent

  Why do you want to give the feedback? Do you and the person you are giving feedback to share a common goal that this feedback helps achieve? Starting your feedback by sharing your intent can set a positive tone for the rest of the conversation. For example, “I want this project to be successful and deliver on time” or “I want the client to view you as the expert that you are on this subject” shows that you are working toward the same goal.

• Fear

  Fear often prevents us from giving feedback. We are worried that the other person will take something the wrong way or that constructive criticism may prevent that person from trying again. Stating that fear is a great way to show that your intent is positive. If anything is making you hesitant to give feedback, consider stating it. Try a statement like “I am worried you will be hesitant to present in the future” or “I am worried you won’t invite me to this meeting again”.

• When

  It is important to be clear about when the incident occurred. Maybe this isn’t the first offense and you are tempted to start your feedback with “you always”. This won’t be helpful information. A person will only be able to change their behavior if they know exactly what incident you are talking about. State the specific meeting and what portion of the agenda you were on.

• What

  Be clear about the actions or behaviors that you are giving feedback on. Don’t beat around the bush. You need Bob to know exactly what the issue was so he understands how to correct it in the future.

• Impact

  It is important to let the person whom you are giving feedback to know the impact of their actions or behaviors. This helps them decide if they want to accept your feedback. This could include how you felt or the resulting actions that were taken. For example, “I felt unappreciated” or “I had to stay late on Friday to fix the report.”

Let’s role play using this interaction between Bob and Sally:

Both teammates are in a brainstorming meeting. Sally pitches an idea for a new feature on the company website. Bob laughs and says, “Sally, you always have such crazy ideas.” The meeting moves on, but Sally is left feeling shut down. She realizes Bob probably didn’t mean to offend her, but she wishes he would have chosen a different way to express his disagreement with her idea. Let’s roleplay the scenario Sally giving feedback to Bob:

Sally: Bob, I’d like to give you some feedback about our brainstorming meeting yesterday. Is now a good time?

Bob: Sure, let’s talk.

Sally: I want to make sure everyone feels comfortable participating in meetings. I want you to be aware of the impact something you said in yesterday’s meeting had on me, but I’m worried you will hesitate to give me feedback in the future.

Bob: I’m glad you asked to talk. What happened?

Sally: In the brainstorming session yesterday, I made a suggestion and you responded by saying that I always have crazy ideas. This made me feel unappreciated, and I limited my participation for the rest of the meeting. I’m not > confident you understood what I was trying to say, but I didn’t have a chance to further explain.

Bob: I’m sorry, Sally. That wasn’t my intent.

Sally: I didn’t think it was. I wanted to make you aware of it, though. In the future if you don’t think my idea is possible, it would help me to have a discussion about why you think that. I’d appreciate it if you asked me about my idea instead of dismissing it.

Bob: Thank you for the feedback. This will help me have more productive meetings in the future.

Sally: You’re welcome.

At Source Allies, we regularly use feedback to deliver better results. Our teammates value open and honest communication and regularly seek out feedback to help them grow. This ensures that we are continuously learning and improving. The next time you have feedback to give, consider using the Intent + Fear + When + What + Impact formula. By including all of these elements in your feedback, you are more likely to provide actionable feedback in a manner that leads to open and non-confrontational dialogue.